I am sorry I didn’t write more in 2024, but of course this is the lesson you learn when your kids get bigger…Things do not get easier, they just get more complicated.
The tired feeling you have after a day of feeding/cleaning/chasing/persuading/coddling/disciplining/teaching little kids morphs into an equally tired feeling of raising bigger kids in a bigger world with bigger problems.
If we ran into trouble (hunger, belligerence, nap-related or stranger danger) at the park or library or store, we could just leave, one screaming baby or toddler tucked under an arm and the rest of the solemn gaggle hustled along holding hands.
But now—and with the maturity of our kids—most of the problems are outside our control, yet affecting us such that we can’t just walk away.
They are growing, and as good growing goes, the kids have to observe that when there is an issue, we stand our ground and handle it.
And so most of my writing has been emails and such, sometimes directed toward a school board that values policy over people, yet doesn’t see it that way. Instead of looking at the root, where concern lies, they look at the fruit and think if we just champion the rotting apples, the tree will get better.
I’ve drafted letters that, I hope, are simple and understandable and not too me-and-my-kids-centric, letters that raise questions—the type of questions that, if one is being honest, open up a new way of thinking. The way that folks will be persuaded by “science” and that which is logical: this is how am attempting to appeal to the situation.
And this gets tricky when you’re limited to one page, or in school board meetings, three minutes.
Honestly, I hate politics. I hate watching the recent confirmation hearing clips of Trump’s cabinet. I hate the vitriol, the intense, palpable defiance of both sides and their unwillingness to drop their pride and egos. Both have erred; neither is sorry. There will be no peaceable transition, just a sticking out of the tongue and nanny nanny boo boo, “sucks to be you, losers,” smirks plastered on their faces, just like the people of four years ago, and the people four years before that.
In my own small community, I want to be a bridge—those were the exact words I used in a meeting with school officials. If science and open-mindedness are so valued, then let’s look at numbers!
And shouldn’t school be the place where academics are valued?
And isn’t school the safe, instituted, big government-funded place to hash it out?
And doesn’t our school district strive to “be the best public school in Colorado”?
But the school board just wants to let the shiny, rotten apples hang on the tree, for freedom’s sake, they say. First amendment rights, they say. Now the rights of some people are more important than others—this is their silent consensus, in an ironic, Orwellian twist, but they don’t see it this way. They honestly think the rotten apples are beautiful and marginalized—they don’t know how rotten they are.
And this is the problem with school boards and politicians with sacred cows that cannot be touched. They peer down into the tiny voices of reason, the three minute public comment spiel or one-page email, and they promptly (and especially) ignore any alarms that the tree is dying, or that the shiny fruit is full of worms.
It doesn’t matter if wisdom is found in quiet learned voices, older generations, or those well-studied, qualified, stable, wholesome community members. History is no longer our teacher. Those in charge in our culture win and succeed by plowing ahead and damning all fences. Fences that, as Chesterton said,
The more modern type of reformer goes gaily up to it and says, “I don’t see the use of this; let us clear it away.” To which the more intelligent type of reformer will do well to answer: “If you don’t see the use of it, I certainly won’t let you clear it away. Go away and think. Then, when you can come back and tell me that you do see the use of it, I may allow you to destroy it.
A modern leader’s sacred cow is destroying fences in favor of laying new highways.
Our local school district is following in the footsteps of Denver Public Schools, which has a LGBTQ agenda and a team that sends out emails signed, in love and rage—four words that, put together, seem strikingly out of place coming from an academic institution.
After receiving an email from a concerned parent (not me) at the beginning of the year regarding various flags posted around the high school as propaganda, our smart superintendent issued a lengthy email that vowed to remove the problem flags:
We are addressing a formal complaint from a school parent about two specific political symbols displayed by staff: Black Lives Matter posters and Pride Progress flags. (These were determined to be political expressions by our legal counsel based on a set of factors such as case law, the original intent of the symbols, and their primary use.)
Our goal is to maintain a neutral environment in our schools that is inclusive for all students and families. To ensure neutrality, we are removing these two symbols from employee workspaces and classrooms.
I was new to the high school at the time—so I sent a quick thank you to the board and superintendent for nipping this in the bud. Back to academics, thank you very much!
But a can of worms was opened; the same worms from those shiny apples came wriggling out into the sun.
A student walk-out was staged. A handful of teachers claimed that, by removing flags, they removed a safe space for troubled kids. Board meetings were had; public comment was accepted.
A large turnout with many flags and weirdos persuaded the board to believe the community majority wanted flags left in schools.
One commenter, a young fellow, announced he was “polyamorous” and that he really needed places to be himself. He assured the board with a sly smile that “polyamorous” didn’t mean he wanted to necessarily have sex with everyone.
I couldn’t believe my ears, couldn’t believe this trash was even being allowed in a public session, let alone in a facility built for the purpose of safely educating children. Rotten apples!
Another public commenter, voice shaking with anger, compared this prescient, historic decision of allowing flags in schools to Ruby Bridges and racial desegregation. “Don’t be on the wrong side of history,” she coolly warned from behind her mask.
(There’s nothing like amplifying your own hurt by associating it with the hurt of something totally unrelated. For what it is worth, our district is less than 1% Black—a far more representative flag than BLM would be something Native American or Hispanic, as these populations make up a quarter of our students. Haven’t we determined by now that BLM and PP flags are ideological in nature, just as much as the AWANA flag we raise on Wednesday nights at our local Baptist church?)
“Destroy these fences!” they screamed.
The board got right to it.
They decided to draft up a policy that, as I said, is based on an established Denver Public Schools policy, and wholeheartedly supported (obviously) by groups such as the high school equity team and gay-straight alliance.
Pushing back was the loud (and admittedly egregious) Colorado Republican Party, threatening to sue the school district for violating the 14th Amendment Equal Protection Clause.
This week, public servant and vice president of the board shot back,
we’re choosing this based on our values, on our policies, on our programming…so if the public doesn’t like it, they can vote us out of office.
So much for neutrality…so much for safety and fences and reasoning and legal council. So much for education, maybe.
And so much for being the best public school in Colorado.
In love and rage. The way schools ought to be run. Keep polishing those rotten apples.
The Drift from Domesticity, The Thing. Chesterton, GK. 1929
Superintendent message regarding legal decision, Cheser, Karen. Email. 10/14/24.
Colorado GOP Threatens to Sue Durango School District over pride flag resolution. Colorado Times Recorder, 1/10/25
Vote Us Out of Office,’ Says Board Member To People Who Don’t Support LGBTQ and BLM Flags in Durango Schools. Colorado Times Recorder, 1/15/25
